From what I can gather, being a hostess requires an IQ of already chewed bubble gum. Having a sense of rotation really isn’t a prerequisite either. Seating customers in only one section so they don’t feel lonely is a lovely idea.

Also, you useless twit biscuits need to stay out of the kitchen. Don’t bother talking to the cooks because they just make fun of your ignorance after you leave. Then they make lewd comments among themselves, talking about what they would stuff in all of your holes.

Being a hostess does have it’s benefits though. It means your shift actually starts 20 minutes after you’re scheduled and ends before any real work has to be done.

Don’t get me wrong, being the hostess helps your parents to realize the true value of getting you braces at six moths old. To bad it will be twenty more years before they realize what a waste buying you six years of a two year collage education was. On an up note, you probably know nothing about more things than the average Joe gets to ever experience.