The Great Spamon Run.
Every fall starts the life cycle of the Spamon. The eggs of the Spamon hatch in early fall. They follow the river currents to the ocean. There they are carried on the tides for several years. Only after reaching full maturity will they return to the very rivers and streams that they were hatched. Many are netted by commercial Spamoners. The ones that escape the fishermans nets swim up stream to spawn. Finally reaching their birth puddle, the Spamon exhausted, release their eggs and semen into the water. Thus the Spamon life cycle continues. Ensuring that Spamon will be a part of your balanced breakfast. Break out the corn flakes and raisin brans. Pilsbury bisquits and honey butter. Breakfast still means something as long as there’s wild Spamon swimming the oceans.
Thanks for the 2.34% tip you lox eating bastard.
Dennis on November 25th, 2007
Thanks for yet another entertaining & informative post, UW. I recently watched a documentary on this very subject and, according to the narrator, you were extremely fortunate to get as much as 2.34%.
Manuel on November 25th, 2007
you know you have been stiffed when you have to work it out to the nearest hundredth….
Upset Waitress on November 25th, 2007
Dennis, Information is the key to the preservation of the wild spamon. Every year their numbers decline. This causes a world wide increase in the price of the prized meat. This effects the rate of gratuity directly and proportionately.
Upset Waitress on November 25th, 2007
Manuel, I don’t mind being stiffed as long as I can find my bra and go home when it’s done.