I’m Going To Travel Through Time Yesterday.
This is the link to buy a time machine on e-bay
Now that I got Daisy’s, Kyk’s, and Minnow’s attention:
If I had all this money to waste I would definitely buy the plans for this time portal. I would have to hire someone to take the blueprint and build the machine for me because I’m not that smart. If I owned the brain capacity to operate the time apparatus I would be able to go back in time… so the seller says. To avoid another fraudulent transaction by a seller with zero feedback, I took the liberty of emailing clockstar1and asked how to get back to the future since the time machine wasn’t erected until the future. After all, he mentions nothing about this in his item description. Then I emailed him again asking him about shipping and handling and if he accepts Paypal. He wrote back and said he would except Paypal at some future date. So now in order to pay for his machine I would have to have his machine to go back in time to make enough money to purchase it, and back to the future to pay for it. Presently this whole time travel issue is confusing me. However, I would consider excepting donations so that I can buy it now and once I complete it I will pay you back yesterday.
Jenny on March 14th, 2008
Either I’m really confused or you’re REALLY drunk? Which is it?
I’ll be back yesterday to find out.
Gorilla Bananas on March 15th, 2008
I don’t like the look of that machine, it’s got too many sharp points. That thing could rape you if you got into a cubicle with it.
nursemyra on March 15th, 2008
my head hurts. where’s schrodinger’s cat?
azahar on March 15th, 2008
This is my favourite bit from the ad…
Price: US $10,000,000.00
Up to $25 back with eBay MasterCard
Manuel on March 15th, 2008
what? eh? um?
moi on March 15th, 2008
Well, if you get your mitts on it, I’d like to be the first to purchase a ride. I need to go back in time and prevent my high school self from buying that particular prom dress.
Blondefabulous on March 15th, 2008
I gots no money to donate now, but a month ago, I coulda helped ya out with a dollar or two…….. come see me.
daisyfae on March 15th, 2008
I’m impressed. I was skeptical, but the authors claim that he discovered this “After Ten Years of Research and Hard Work” convinced me. “Hard Work”. Wow. That’s more impressive than references in peer reviewed journals… and he says it’s his life’s work! Wow! All this from a 10 year old!
But there could be something to this - he lives in Las Vegas. Unfortunately, i already KNOW how to time travel there. Every time i visit, i get shitfaced drunk, and wake up 2 days later.
The down side is i can’t bid. He says “NO WAR MACHINES”.
Beaverboosh on March 15th, 2008
Having developed and used my own time machine to arrive here from the future I can vouch that the maths are mind boggling!
It is his last statement I find curious ‘Price is Set to Increase Substancually’. Substancually is not a measurement system with which I am familiar.
Has he also developed some new quantum for pricing this asset?
Mark on March 15th, 2008
I will gladly pay you last Tuesday for a hamburger today…
Woeful on March 15th, 2008
Time travel isn’t all it’s cracked up to be if our patron “Space Ace” is any indicator.
upsetwaitress on March 15th, 2008
Jenny, Don’t bother. I’ll explain it last week.
Gorilla, And that would be a bad thing HOW?
Nursemyra, About to locked in it’s box.
Azahar, Hey! Take a rebate where you can.
Manuel, Don’t stress about it. Someone will be around to explain it to you when you were ten.
Moi, You should also give yourself the winning lotto numbers for the remainder of your years.
Blonde, Maybe I will next year.
Daisy, To be fair, he cheated. After
he completed it on his hundredth birthday he came back to his conception to explain it to himself as a fetus.
Beaverboosh, I believe he is simply over estimating the laws of supply and demand. I demand he supply proof beyond his cocktail napkin scribbles, and will you call me three days ago about not writing this post yesterday.
Mark, I knew that was coming.
Woeful, Thanks to recent “advancements” in drugs, that would be the spaced age.
Native Minnow on March 15th, 2008
How did you know it was so easy to get my attention? That said, you might not have realized how easy it is to lose it. Hey, look at that shiny object over there.
pajama momma on March 16th, 2008
Are you crazy? Do you not know what happened to Napoleon Dynamite and Uncle Rico when they tried to use a time machine? It wasn’t pretty.
savannah on March 16th, 2008
i would like to go back and erase my facebook entry
kyknoord on March 17th, 2008
When you get the time machine, could you save me some in a bottle?
gullybogan on March 17th, 2008
I once will have a time machine.
I buy it so that i went back to the past and including the future tense in English.
A lot of the other languages had a future tense - a PROPER future tense (none of this “will have” ‘future tense’ nonsense) - and English hasing this tense envy thing gone on.
I will be fond of English. It was my favourite language. And it still is. And has been…
(NB: You can’t time travel properly in English - best to time travel in French or something)