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How can you tell if your dog is retarded? You can simply ask him or if he starts acting like a human wearing vegan shoes, he is definitely retarded. Throw a blanket over him and see how long it takes him to get out. Another way to determine if your mutt is retarded is if he wags his head instead of his tail. If it is a cockapoo it is definitely retarded and you ought not keep it. You certainly shouldn’t step in it. If it is a peekapoo, again it is a no brainer that it is retarded, and the only thing it is good for is playing hide and seek. If it is a chahuahua it needs to learn how to spell wah wah. If it’s name is Paco you should kick it. If it’s name is Hans he wishes you a happy birthday.
Mark on March 30th, 2008
Cute puppy!
Paco on March 31st, 2008
Hey! I’ve been kicked enough and I wished the Bitch a happy birthday and what did I get? NOTHING. Hans is a suck up.
Jenny on March 31st, 2008
Thank you Hans - you look more normal than any I have at home. Do you pee outside? You can come live with me.
daisyfae on March 31st, 2008
i thought my dog was retaded because he eats poo and barks randomly when he gets signals from the dog planet (yet an axe-wielding clown could plant the first hit squarely in my head before Mr. Watch Dog would wake up).
But seriously. Paco needs help.
Maybe we should have a telethon?
Gorilla Bananas on March 31st, 2008
A dog is retarded if it walks into a Korean restaurant.
kyknoord on March 31st, 2008
Thank you, Hans. It’s not actually my birthday - I just look older.
Blondefabulous on March 31st, 2008
You have seen the furry rat posing as a dog that lives with me. If he ain’t retarded, he needs to be retested! Birthdays are for suckers, just get ‘em a beer!
Axe on March 31st, 2008
Is this a status dog?
moi on March 31st, 2008
I know a ‘tarded dog, actually. She has a little buddy dog (not ‘tarded) who shows her around, prevents her from repeatedly head-butting the wall as she searches for the dog door. Hans doesn’t look mentally compromised, though. He looks like a dog after Moi’s own heart.
she on March 31st, 2008
a mount for trout!!! a consort; a luffarr, a humper. hans. thats not your everyday dog name. i like it!! and him.
ive done that throw they blanket over the head test. all the dogs passed with flying colors. its mr. she im worried about……..grrrherhahaha
Manuel on March 31st, 2008
tremendous looking mutt…….
Native Minnow on March 31st, 2008
It’s actually much easier than that. If your dog is a dog, it’s retarded.
sohos on March 31st, 2008
Cute doggie!
walker on March 31st, 2008
And that’s why I have a retarded cat
savannah on April 1st, 2008
did that dag jes eat some peanut butter, sugar? or bless his heart, does he always look like that? xoxox
moooooog35 on April 1st, 2008
…and to think, all this time I’ve been giving my dog Rorschach tests made from his own poo.
My file cabinet is really starting to stink…so this is very helpful.
becky on April 1st, 2008
Outta my face bitch!
Eric on April 2nd, 2008
… I may be wrong, but I think he’s just yawning……
Beaverboosh on April 5th, 2008
I have been looking for a retarded eco friendly dog that I can turn into a pair of shoes, a sort of slow puppies!