Okay so this is what I have been doing for therapy the past couple of days. A nautical garden party all by myself. Well, I’ve had the company of tailless lizards. Anyway, everything you see here has been stolen or picked out of the dumpster. Stolen things are much nicer just so you know, remind me to tell you about that. Remember my pussy plant? It’s planted in that boat hanging on the fence. The boat? I stole it. I had to beat back forty refugees to get it. The lobster traps? Those were a double bonus. Not only did I get the traps, but I got the twelve lobster that were in them when I stole them. The big tall grass? Yep, I ripped it out of the ground when I was visiting one of the national parks in broad daylight. In order to get it out of the park, I put it on my head and told the park ranger it was a punk rock wig. When I got it home I noticed that I was the proud owner of two endangered species. They were delicious. I also took the “Yield” sign, but that’s another project.
16 Responses to ' Instead Of Beating My Child… '
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on May 14th, 2008 at 7:58 pm
That must be some kind of therapy. I like it though.
on May 14th, 2008 at 8:56 pm
Somewhere some skipper is cussing out the bitch that stole his wheel…
on May 14th, 2008 at 9:22 pm
Arrrrrrrrrgh… ya needs ya some pirate swag, matey… and a plank for scurvey dogs to walk. Hang it over your twat-flower. That’ll teach ‘em…
on May 14th, 2008 at 9:33 pm
You bring new meaning to going to the park to find some Booty
on May 15th, 2008 at 12:18 am
I actually like this. Go figure.
on May 15th, 2008 at 1:44 am
Ah, you are becoming one with everything. In the case of the endangered species, quite literally.
on May 15th, 2008 at 4:59 am
*chortle*
on May 15th, 2008 at 7:45 am
I thought that was you, that grass thing, squatting down in the pot.
on May 15th, 2008 at 8:41 am
Al Gore would be proud. Everything, ah-hem, reused and recycled as it should be.
on May 15th, 2008 at 11:04 am
it looks great. i have salvaged from dumpsters behind frame shops and art stores and book stores. none of that made a very nice patio unless you like white trash post hurricane with spray paint decor.
re: the cock – the big striped one? grrrerhahaha
andecook@tds.net 18.00 free shippin’ and a special treat for you included.
on May 15th, 2008 at 11:21 am
a little sanctuary, sugar? xox
on May 15th, 2008 at 12:30 pm
Hey Sammi,
I am really impressed both with your light fingered and green fingered skills. You’re the best..
on May 15th, 2008 at 3:37 pm
stop by sparringK9 i did a cartoon for you
on May 15th, 2008 at 9:28 pm
Do you have big hooters or not? Enquiring minds.
on May 16th, 2008 at 7:55 am
Never discount a good beating for your children. If you spare the rod, you spoil the child! And you end up with little bastards like the one who stole his gramma’s car, wrecked the whole neighborhood, and then told the cops and the news, “It’s fun to do bad things!”
Beat the shit outta them all, I say!!!!!!!
on May 16th, 2008 at 12:14 pm
I didn’t realize Tecate was nautical.
You learn something new every day.