What Makes Me Happy?

A lot of things make me happy. I noticed today that the things that make me the happiest start with the letter “B”. Blogging for example. Now combine that with Beer and this is how happy it makes me.

Happier than a retard with a puh puh puh puppy.
Happier than a puppy with a r r r retard(curl hand here).
Happier than Moi at a sample sale at Neiman’s.
Happier than a fly on a turd.
Happier than Dick Cheney stepping on puppies, kittens and orphans…
It makes me happier than a lesbian under a pussy tree.
Happier than Joyce Dick Lam Poon at a genital naming conference!
Happier than a legless midget in a whore house.
Happier than 72 Virgins trampling a muslib.
Happier than a priest at a Boyz To Men concert.
Happier than a Catholic Priest at an unsupervised all-boy quadraplegic deaf-mute day camp.
Happier than a fat chick on a Harley.
Happier than Jeffry Dahmer in a morgue.
Happier than Obama at a “Support Your Local Marxist” event.
Happier than a Jihadist strapped to a dirty bomb on a White House tour.
Happier than Sally Struthers eating an Ethiopian.
Happier than a Nazi in a synagogue at a bake sale.
Happier than a Michael Moore with an axe to grind.

Feel free to add on. I’ll link your “happier than” to your site!

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12 Comments so far

  • Gorilla Bananas on May 22nd, 2008

    Lesbian under a pussy tree? I’ll believe it when I see it.

  • daisyfae on May 22nd, 2008

    Dick Cheney stepping on puppies, kittens and orphans…

  • kyknoord on May 23rd, 2008

    Happier than a Michael Moore with an axe to grind.

  • axe victim on May 23rd, 2008

    Honey, I’m home!

  • nursemyra on May 23rd, 2008

    “a priest at a boyz to men concert”?

    best line yet :-)

  • moi on May 23rd, 2008

    Happier than Moi at a sample sale at Neiman’s.

  • moooooog35 on May 23rd, 2008

    Happier than Lindsay Lohan at an open bar.

    Happier than Tara Reid running a “fuck for a dollar” booth.

    Happier than Anna Nicole Smith not overdosing and puking all over herself and dying and shit.

    That’s all I’ve got.

  • Blackiswhite, Imperial Agent Provocateur on May 23rd, 2008

    Happier than Obama at a “Support Your Local Marxist” event.

    Happier than Hillary at a “Clinton Rape Victims” meeting.

    Happier than McCain at a “Brigde Building” event with Howeird Dean and the DNC.

  • moooooog35 on May 23rd, 2008

    Happier than a Catholic Priest at an unsupervised all-boy quadraplegic deaf-mute day camp.

  • Abbadon on May 23rd, 2008

    Happier than a john with a bag of quarters and a two-bit whore.

  • beaverboosh on May 24th, 2008

    Happier than Joyce Dick Lam Poon at a genital naming conference!

  • Wise Old Troll on May 24th, 2008

    Happier than 72 Virgins trampling a muslib.

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