I didn’t make much money today and I totally blame it on the weather. It’s super cold down here. Somewhere around 57 degrees or something. I don’t know, it’s too cold to see the weather channel. Anyway it’s hard to waitress in long johns, leg warmers, a trench coat, oven mitts, and an electric blanket shoved down my underwear. Plus with my eyeballs frozen over I couldn’t see the shit I was serving. That is, if they even got shit, in which case they were lucky. Because who wants to get shit for breakfast or lunch? Besides them weird shit eaters. And don’t think I can’t tell who you are. You creeps order things like “shit on a shingle” or a “poo poo platter”. And it’s freaks like you that make me a shitty waitress. Pfft!

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