Fucking Etsy. If you don’t know what Etsy is, I’ll tell you. It’s a place where hippies sell their handmade shit for a fortune. Even with this failing economy, Charles Manson sells his pubic art and Pee Wee Herman sells his cum stained pocket socks for thousands of dollars. That’s Etsy. Anyway, I figure I can sell my seeds right? Not organic seeds either, my seeds are on steroids, hormones, vodka, and Red Bull, because I want one hell of a monster crop. I disclosed why my shit is the best in town on my sale page which totally backfired on me. Every bean eating, tit sucking buyer/seller emailed me about how I’m destroying the earth..bla bla bla. So I did a bulk response “How am I destroying the earth asslickers?” Essentially they all responded “cuz yer contaminating our soil and your seeds aren’t natural man”. That was the final straw. I bulk emailed the Etsy hippies telling them all that if they had a problem with me or my seeds, I would be more than happy to come over to their teepee in my giant ozone eating, global heat wave making, road kill producing, pickup truck and run them and their hippie wanna be offspring over. That would put them out of their misery. More importantly put them out of mine. Speaking of…. Does anyone know how to get blood out from under the wheel well, and fingers out from in between the tire tread?
11 Responses to ' Dung, Yarn, And Twigs. '
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on December 30th, 2009 at 1:40 am
Put a spray pump thing (like from windex) on a bottle of hydrogen peroxide and you can spray away the blood. It’s what Martha Stewart would do.
Fingers do require a bit more work. Use a fork and butter knife to dislodge from the tread. Hydrogen peroxide away the bloody residue and your tires will be like new!
on December 30th, 2009 at 7:21 am
bleach. and as a bonus? when you clorox the tires? you can also make some rockin’ white smoke effects to further annoy the hippies….
on December 30th, 2009 at 4:20 pm
After you dislodge the fingers maybe if you could grind them up, mix in some dirt and include them as starter for your seeds.
on December 30th, 2009 at 11:40 pm
I don’t know linah. Hippies play stink finger for fun. Shit is shit but my dirt is nuclear.
on December 30th, 2009 at 11:46 pm
I’m a firm believer in bleach too daisy. I’ve even drank it. So it creates a white smoke effect? Would my wheels go all tied dyed and stuff too? That’d be neato.
on December 31st, 2009 at 8:44 am
I actually love Etsy but this shit is pretty damn funny! I can’t believe someone really ragged you because of your seeds. Oh, and hydrogen peroxide is actually pretty good for getting out blood stains.
on December 31st, 2009 at 11:17 am
More then one person bunny. Everything is organic in my eyes but them hillbillies over there don’t think so.
on December 31st, 2009 at 1:02 pm
That’s some jacked up bull shizz. What kind of seeds do you have and what are they on? I am a big ‘ol vegetable garden girl. As long as it doesn’t make me glow, I might be interested.
on January 1st, 2010 at 11:55 pm
Mini bell pepper seeds bunny. I feed the plant steroids and it makes a big difference. I’ll mail you some. Not steroids, but seeds.
on January 2nd, 2010 at 7:13 am
Bleach kills any AIDS virus in all that blood, as an added bonus…
on January 16th, 2010 at 3:07 am
That’s upsetwaitress for ya. Sewing seeds of kindness wherever she goes. lol.
PussDaddy