This site has recently been a source of some mild controversy. (DRAMA!) To witch I have decided to add this informal binding disclaimer which will now appear on the top of the page, or at the bottom, or maybe in a window. Fine print? Who knows it will be somewhere. It will go something like this:
WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING
This blog is known to the state of California to cause Cancer, anal seepage, cramping, muscle spasm, brain lesions, insomnia, swelling of genitalia, vocal chord paralysis, a profuse bulging of the eyes, sudden graying or loss of hair, unexplained fits of rage, complete confusion, a sharp increase of hormone levels, stroke, heart attack, hives, bronchial constriction, a discoloring of skin and nails, tooth loss, halitosis, dizziness, anemia, loss of appetite, sleep apnea, breast deflation, runny nose, athletes foot, stupidity, partial labotimations, bleeding of the colon and stomach, blurred vision, an increased urge to gamble and use elicit drugs, kidney stones, premature birth, long awaited death, stimulated intelligence followed by complete destruction of all effected tissues, liver spots, hypoglycemia, diabetes, leprosy and more. For a complete list of side effects pull your head from your ass and go fucuk yourself.
You should not use this blog if you have any of the following symptoms, Itching do to bed sores, bed bugs, bed head, herpes, dandruff, mosquito, ant, or Tsi-tsi fly bites, abdominal swelling due to tapeworms, starvation, tumor, or bad chili, or if you have existing breathing disorders such as asthma, puncture wound, or genitalia crammed in your mouth.
You should not drive while using this blog. DRIVE! Do not expose to temperatures below fifty degrees Fahrenhiet or above fifty-one degrees Fahrenhiet. Dispose of properly. Do not incinerate. Contents under Pressure. This blog is not recommended for persons under the age of one hundred, or over the age of conception.
Upset waitress, will not be held liable for any and all mental, emotional, bodily, or property damage sustained due to the use of this site by anyone with the above mentioned conditions, or if you have a pulse, if you don’t have a pulse, if you are any form of flora or fauna, basic element, atom or subatomic fragment, symbol, or other thing on this planet or in the vast reaches of space, Inter-dimensional, existential, made up or real, or Mitt Romney. So sayeth the waitress, goddess of all she surveys, and the rest of it too.
SURGEON GENERAL’ WARNING:
Not tipping may be hazardous to your health.
5 Responses to ' Official Disclaimer. '
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on April 28th, 2008 at 3:13 am
You belong to a lunatic or schizophrenic facility. Why are you still roaming the streets for your next victims?
on May 4th, 2008 at 6:02 pm
I love you too?
on July 13th, 2009 at 3:10 pm
ok, duly noted, sugar. do i have to sign or mail in something now? xoxox ;~D
on October 28th, 2009 at 9:39 pm
UW, the Closed Ward Supervisor is looking for you. She is letting out the inmates one at a time in search of your weirdness.
pf
on October 28th, 2009 at 9:50 pm
I’m not weird, I’m gifted.