Welcome To My World.

Well RG is finally getting settled into the island life. I’ve been on my best behavior thus far by only drinking at work and such. It’s not like I shoot up at work, but still, she’s probably freaking out about our lax lifestyles in these parts. When she visits me in rehab on Thursday I’m totally going to tell her how much I love that she can legally drive without blowing into a breathalizer to start her car. I mean it’s such a quality in a friend. Not only that, she lives amid 13 bars. How cool of a friend is that? I can’t wait for my next day off with her. I am going sit by the pool at her new place drinking margaritas and eating Xanax pie to forget how crappy my job is and pretend that my old man doesn’t exist. I will listen to my ipod and scream every song at the top of my lungs until her neighbors decide to move back up north. Then I’m going to pass out in front of the sales office of her complex so that no one else will try to move in. Because that’s what friends do for one another. I am so glad Restaurant Gal is going to finally get to experience the suck hole I live in the way I do.

Jaunita Mi Perro es una Buena Chica.


Nothing is cuter then Jaunita Maria Anita Rosa Lopez. My son brought home a baby bunny, which I laid out moth traps to rid it, finally I clubbed it to death for even attempting to be cuter then Juanita. Anyway, my puppy is so cute she can do no wrong. It was adorable watching her dig a big crater in the front lawn yesterday. She did such a good job the neighbor kid fell into it and broke his leg. She was even cute when she attacked the mailman. Blood was dripping from her little chin. Christmas day she took a sloppy crap all over my mother in laws shoes. I was so pleased I rewarded her by letting her eat my mother in laws panties and shit in her purse so the next time she reaches for a napkin to spit on to wipe the dirt from my kids face she will get a handful of turd.

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