Well you may be wondering why I haven’t posted in so long? It’s not because I went to jail. I haven’t been in rehab lately either. It’s not because I have better things to do, and it’s not because I lost my internet. It’s not because I died obviously and it’s not because my hands were torn off in some sort of drunken chainsaw accident. It’s not because I forgot to post and it’s not because I found God. It’s not because my computer was stolen and it’s not because my trailer burnt down. It’s more simple. The reason why I haven’t posted in so long is because I’m a lazy bitch.

Ok I’m a bad blogger. Like a severe case of herpes, I am back though. My sudden absence was because I stupidly took on another job and simply didn’t have time for anything. Luckily I got fired from my other job and I’m now down to just one. I’ve been trying to get fired from that job too but I don’t think it will happen. My boss is more fucked up then me and so is the staff. Last night the manager showed up in mix-matched socks and his shirt on backwards. Which must have been awkward considering it was his ex-wife’s frilly, double breasted blouse. I spent half the night trying to figure out how the hell he buttoned the damn thing. I did notice that his purse matched one of his shoes nicely. Even though the purse matched the red crocodile stiletto it was a little odd looking with the black and white saddle shoe. Then the managers boss showed up. Ironically, wearing the other half of the managers ensemble. That black patent leather purse popped against the sequinsed skirt and Metalica T-shirt. It’s no wonder I can’t get fired. These people make my fucked up look like sober. I just hope I will have more chances to tell you all about it.

I don’t know what the hell this is, but it lives in my house and I named it. I don’t get how she can take up my whole bed either. It seems like only yesterday she found me and I had her balls cut off.